It's better to enjoy a few happy days at a regional attraction than to spend an African safari fretting about how you're going to pay for it. Deciding what you can realistically spend not only removes stress but helps you narrow choices.

The average family's longest trip last year was 7.9 days and cost $1,005, according to the Travel Industry Association of America, a trade group. Those costs suggest that a number of families in the survey were bringing down averages in the traditional cost-saving ways: staying with relatives, camping or sharing a house with friends. A few cost-cutting tips:

Seek out family deals. Many hotel brands offer family packages. Common deals include kids stay free, kids eat free, and buy one room, get an adjoining one at half-price.

Join frequent-flier and frequent-stay programs. Frequent-stay points or airline miles can be cashed in for free rooms. If you have some of either but not enough for a freebie, you might have enough for an upgrade from a room to a suite, which could save you the cost of a second room. Alternately, if you can upgrade to the concierge floor, you'll not only get free breakfast but often free drinks and snacks as well.

Brainstorm options as a family. It's always a good idea to ask your kids where they want to go. But that doesn't mean handing over control of the trip to them. Choose two or three destinations that are within your budget, then let the children vote. Or ask the children to write down five things they'd like to do; then you choose a destination that fulfills at least one wish of each family member.

Think creatively. Want your kids to learn something on vacation? Inexpensive options recommended by experts include historical sites, especially those that create a living history environment with actors in the family.

Giving kids choices within whatever parameters you've set invests them in the experience. But your pre-trip planning meetings are a good time to discuss not only what you'll be doing but what you won't be doing. Anticipate the things that could drive you nuts - wet towels thrown into the luggage, constant whining about buying things - and agree upfront how things will go.